“twas brillig…
…and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe…
And thus begins a new era of hilarity, awesomeness, and the general sort of malaise that the genius possess and the insane lament. I would have posted earlier, but for those of you who are unfamiliar with trying to get a website up, the internets are a fickle and mysterious mistress. (thanks to Justin for his help)
Today marks the second day of my retirement from corporate life. Yesterday was somewhat of a bust, seeing as I was held hostage at my house by UPS, but I’ll write more on that later.
You are probably asking yourself, how does a 26 year old retire? The short answer is, he doesn’t. The drawn out version goes something like this:
I came through university as I think a lot of us do. I was immature, naive, and didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. All I knew was that, straight out of the door, I wanted to make a lot of money. I wasn’t sure how or why, nor did I really care. I thought that if i made tons of loot, then I would have enough free time to pursue the things I loved outside of work and my job would be just a job. Some people become inspired in college through some charismatic professor or find it within themselves; I don’t think you could have inspired me with a cattle prod made of enlightenment and hope. Like I said, I was immature and naive.
Come graduation, I set my sights on the traditional job, the most common of the vocations in the animal kingdom. Work in a suit (or “business casual”), drink coffee, talk business, be professional. Social interactions were to be limited to “the game” or yardwork or other such domestic trivialities. I fully expected to be settled down with a wife and house by the time I was 26.
I went to work for an investment banking firm. It was high profile, payed a lot, and was “statusy.” The people I worked with were competent and hardworking. I won’t write too much about it here, but suffice it to say I was moderately happy with my job, for which I count myself extremely lucky.
Over the course of my employment, I gradually became unhappy with my situation. I wouldn’t say I was disgruntled (in fact, I was very gruntled). I just became a little unnerved by how complacent I was becoming. Things around work were getting easier, and the money was getting better.
David, what the hell is wrong with that?!
Hmmm, you bring up a valid point. However, this post is getting long and burdensome, and while I find myself incredibly interesting, there are some of you (mental midgets, no doubt) who may be getting a little sleepy.
Stay tuned for the second installment!



Hi I'm David. I'm horrendously unphotogenic, so this is as close as you get! Cheers!
June 30th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Hello David!
1st poster lol omg!
July 1st, 2008 at 10:11 am
OMG LOL!
July 4th, 2008 at 12:19 pm
I’m not surprised to see your witty and intellectual stories of UPS encounters, early retirement and embracing the nerd within us. Sadly, I feel this particular blong entry ended too abruptly, regardless of the current length you mentioned earlier. I must hear more about the adventures of David.
I certainly regard this blog with a great deal of appreciation; as we discussed at The Glenwood over Celebrator goat beer and a plate of pimento cheese, it’s a shame to live your life with expectations that can only be described as mediocre. Go out and do something epic!
P.S. I think a great sub-blog would be the Porch Periodicals… Your front porch has intriguing stories of pirate hats and interpretive dance, ukelele serenades, cock roach pitcher captures (speaking of which, I dreamed about last night), and the list goes on.
July 5th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
well done, stay tuned for the porch periodicals!
July 7th, 2008 at 8:02 pm
It was the trip to Nepal that did you in!!! Congrats on your first steps…